Music Mashups Round 9

Time for Round 9 of the awesome Music Mashups. Casey and I were on top of it this week. As always, visit her blog for 1-10.

11. Some Girls Accidentally In Love Do….Really believe that Edward will come rescue them or Harry Potter is better off with them and not Ginny. Right, Kimberly the pink Power Ranger is going to just jump through my window to take me away or Daphne from Scooby Doo is gonna need me to rescue her from some moron in a mask. Yeah, keep dreaming.

12. Never Live Like You Were Dying Alone…cause if you’re gonna go, you might as well take someone with you, right?

13. Good Slide Directions…sit on your butt. Extend your legs with your feet in front of you. Push off. Go “Wheee” until you hit the bottom. Repeat.

14. It’s My Kinda Jumper Party…Well, unfortunately, you only get to attend one jumper party. So I guess when you go, enjoy. You’re not going to another one.

15. Ladies Love Jaded Country Cowboys….”Girls don’t bring home the bad guys, Logan. They bring home the good guys.” Now I want to watch X2: X-Men United.

16. True Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap: I’m not even going to go there. Well, except to ask what the difference between a True Dirty Deed and a Fake Dirty Deed is.

17. Nothing On But the Radio Because of You….It’s all your fault. You threw the basketball, it hit the TV. You got frustrated with the computer and threw it out the window. Thanks a lot! Now we have to listen to the stupid radio with the annoying people that won’t shut up and play music.

18. Don’t You Wanna Stay Barely Breathing: I mean, come on, barely breathing is better than not breathing at all. Not quite as good as breathing normally, I know. Sometimes, in writing, I feel like my characters are barely breathing. They need more life sometimes. Or…at my writer buddy Graham’s suggestion, I could just kill them off.

19. Daddy’s Cowboy Casanova Money: Did Daddy leave Mommy for….nah, not going there. If my daughter starts seeing a Cowboy Casanova, I’m going to have some Cowboy Casanova Money…for a shotgun that will hang in my living room.

20. You Lie On a Plain: As opposed to You Stand on a Mountain? Or are you shouting false information in the middle of a field. “The sky is green!” “Purple elephants parade in my house!” “Harry Potter is my best friend!” “Bella is hot!” (Ok, maybe those last two are a sign of a delusional mind. You may want to see someone about that.)

Alien abductions are involuntary, but probings are scheduled.


My 10 Favorite Disney Characters

As I was writing this post, I learned that three of my favorite writers (based off personality since I’ve only read one book written by one of them) have a new weekly podcast. Honestly, with Robison Wells, Sarah Eden, and Marion Jensen how can you go wrong? Well, you can’t. They’re all awesome. They’re all hilarious. So go check this out! I’m excited to be listening weekly. You should be too.

Now back to your regularly unscheduled programming…

I haven’t done a Top 10 Day in a while. So, I’m going to look at Disney for a moment. It’s a cultural icon. My mom was a big fan of what Disney put out. My wife is a big Disney person (seriously, if you want a challenge on Disney Trivial Pursuit, please come visit so I can get a good laugh.) But instead of a countdown of a top ten, I’m going to define 10 categories and name a favorite to go in that category.

1. Favorite Dwarf: Doc. Easy reasons here: Doc is intelligent, a born leader, and, well….cause everyone else seems to like Dopey and Grumpy. People seem to have issues with Happy. Everyone associates with Sleepy. I hate being Sneezy. Bashful is too….red faced. So yeah, Doc.

2.  Favorite Hero: Aladdin. Kind of a difficult connection, but I’ve always envied Aladdin for the magic lamp. I would love three wishes. Just having my number one wish involving being a published author would be nice. (And by published author, I would have a specific way of wording it so I get what I want.) But I like that Aladdin learns, despite his wishes, he’s still who he is. And that’s the person that Jasmine fell in love with.

3. Favorite Comedy Relief: Genie. Honestly, you’ve got to go to Aladdin and the King of Thieves for the best comedy as Robin Williams puts his all into the Genie character. The third movie in the Aladdin trilogy was honestly movie theater worthy.

4.  Favorite Sidekick: LeFou. I’ve always thought of myself as the short sidekick. (Unless I was on a crime fighting team with Sarah Eden, then I’d be the tall sidekick.) If I actually were put in a role in a movie, I’d probably be the eager, apprentice-like, moronic sidekick. Yeah, I’m pretty honest about me.

5. Favorite Magical Character: Merriweather. Who wouldn’t want her as a fairy guardian? She’s gonna give you everything you want and do it with her funny little voice. Plus, everything’s blue.

6. Favorite Villain: Malificent: Honestly, she’s got to be one of the most powerful beings in any Disney movie. That’s why she’s the last you battle during Kingdom Hearts.

7. Favorite Hundred Acre Wood Character: Tigger. Growing up, my mom put a personality onto me and my brothers from Winnie-the-Pooh. My oldest brother was Winnie-the-Pooh, my older brother was Eeyore, and I was Tigger. I had a few Tigger items given to me once that ‘connection’ was made. However, Mary is ten times the Tigger fan that I am. Honestly, you should see the Tigger collection. Getting rid of some of it, that’s been difficult.

8. Favorite Traditional Character: Mickey Mouse. Ok, so you’ve got a few options in ‘traditional.’ Mickey, Goofy, Donald, Daisey, Minnie, and Pluto. I’d give you Huey, Dewey, and Louie. But for me, I think I go back to Mickey Mouse. Donald is a close second, but I really think there’s something about the character that is the Disney icon.

9. Favorite Princess: Belle. Yes, I have a favorite princess. FYI, my mom brainwashed me into liking her. I went to Disneyland once with a couple of friends. I was bummed because my ex-girlfriend had just broken up with me. Well, I was determined to have fun. So, when we saw the princesses waving at the little girls at Disneyland and taking pictures, I told my friends “Hey, I’m gonna go propose to Belle.” So I went up to her and asked if I could take a picture of me proposing. She agreed (probably reluctantly). But, I’ve got a nice geeky picture of me proposing to Belle. And you don’t.

10. All-time Favorite Character: Heimlich. “Ooo….Candy Corn, let me help you to finish it.” “Yoo-hoo, Mr. Early Bird, how about a nice tasty vurm on a shtick.” “Finally, I’m a beautiful butterfly!” “But I am flying. And from way up here, you all look like little ants.” Yep, gotta love the fat caterpillar.

So, hope you learned something today. Pick one of the categories and tell me who your favorite is and why.

Alien abductions are involuntary, but probings are scheduled.

Music Mashups – Round 8

It’s back! Yep, that’s right, another round of titles that Casey and I heard on the radio at the same time and have combined them to come up with awesome titles for your reading pleasure! Aren’t you excited? You’re not? Dude, what’s your problem then?

11. Tubthumping Gives You Hell: Well, yeah. If you pound that much whiskey down your throat, I’d be surprised if it didn’t.

12. Kids in Bloom: Just ask my friends that are mom’s about this one. One day they’re in your arms, the next, they’re telling you they need to watch Rob Reiner movies for a class assignment, and understand what’s going on. (Yes, that is a shout out to someone.)

13. Walking Contradiction, Yes!: Slightly worse than a walking hypocrite. This person’s actually excited to be a walking contradiction.

14. Redneck Yacht Club Can’t Stop Partying: See #1. Well, they’re rednecks. More than likely it’d be Tubthumping Gives You Time in the Slammer for Using that Shotgun.

15. A Different World Smells Like Teen Spirit: I bet this Different World we’re talking about is your teenager’s bedroom. How much you wanna bet?

16. Remember When the Freshman…Perhaps it’s better that we don’t go there.

17. Too Much Fun My Next 30 Years: Day 1: Cry because this is a cold world. Day 35: Spit up on someone’s face. Day 94: Maybe I’ll sit up. Day 320: Ok, I guess I’ll do this walking thing. Year 4: I’m going to pretend to be a baby for the attention I miss. Year 10: You’re pissing me off, I’m going to my room and playing. Year 15: You’re pissing me off, I’m going to a friend’s. Year 18: Free at last, free at last! Year 21: Partying like it’s 1999. Year 25: I miss my old bedroom and lack of responsibility. Year 29: Please, can’t we just turn back time?

18. Hello World Please Remember Me: My name is Bob and I am on Twitter and Facebook in a vain attempt to create the illusion that I have friends and people like me. My life is so unimportant to me that I need these things to feel important. The best solution to this was given by Kaley Cuoco’s character Penny on “The Big Bang Theory” when she said “I go outside and talk to people.”

19. Where is My Mind As She’s Walking Away?: Where most guys’ minds are when she’s walking away: on her back. A little lower. A little lower. Yeah, more than likely, it’s right there.

20. I Should Be Sleeping in the Garage: There’s another term for this: doghouse. The questions are: what did you do? What didn’t you do? How many flowers will it require to get you back in the house? How much chocolate will you need? (Seriously, isn’t that the best mashup? It should win the Bronz Award for Best Mashup in 2011)

Wait, I’m Not Done?

Ok, first, no, I’ve not finished this draft of Eli yet. But I keep realizing more and more that the closer I get to finishing it, I’m still very far from finishing the book. What’s that mean?

Well, it means that I’m getting closer to beginning my revisions. Yeah, you know that quote I’ve given of Brandon Sanderson. “To begin is human, to finish divine, and to revise is pure hell.” My problem, I know that Eli is told by the viewpoint of a 14-year old. Unfortunately, I’m not fourteen anymore. I’m more than twice that. So, I’ve received the same comment from different people concerning my book in this regard: “He doesn’t speak like a teenager.”

Wow, I’m so out of it. I thought I was still cool and hip. (Wait, no, that would require having been cool and hip at one point in time.) Regardless, I really don’t know how teens speak today. But then I ask the question, don’t I want my book to be timeless? If I write it in today’s lingo, it’ll be old school in a matter of months. But I don’t want to use ‘BIIIIG words’ to confuse them. Gr! Why is life so hard? Ok, not the question here. Why is writing so hard?

Well, I’ve found some helpful solutions. I’m going to research the most vile and disgusting thing that there is in this world: Teenagers. (That actually pays homage to Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers: The Movie.) Actually, I have an idea presented to me through a critiquer and I think I’m going to take it as far as I can. Now to find more teenagers willing to talk to me. Maybe I can convince some aliens to abduct them and me. Force their conversation. No wait, that’s a plot for a book. Which leads me to….

Alien abductions are involuntary, but probings are scheduled.

11 Down, Who Knows Now

No, I’m not referring to 2011 being done already. I’m actually referring to the fact that I have just finished chapter 11 in Eli. (I have no clue still what I think of that title.)

What this means to me is: I’ve been scared that I won’t hit the 70,000-word mark. As long-winded as I am in speaking, writing meaningful words that aren’t crap is a lot more difficult. But I keep finding different plot twists to impede my character’s progression toward his goal. Because of a random idea I had concerning a way to get a character to join the rest, it’s added at least 2 chapters (in my mind, we’ll see when I get there). Plus, I’ve added another block toward my main character’s goal, one that will hopefully be an exciting battle that he has to helplessly watch.

For the first time in the 5 drafts I’ve written for this book, this feels like the version I put the most pride toward. First, I’m writing in first-person. It’s the first time, my characters feel authentic. Second, the flow of the story is much better. Each chapter works well individually and moves like an episode to a television series. To me that is. (Self-praise is always more flattering or more demeaning, depending on the mood.) Third, I know that when it’s all done and I write ‘the end’, it will be the ending that I envisioned in 2005 when I first created this world.

Writing is an art. There are so many ways to go about it. Each writer/artist has their own technique. What works for someone may not work for someone else. I’m very pleased that it is. The reason I state this is I feel that Eli is more of a piece of art than work. I’ve invested a lot to this book in the past. Time and energy have both been spent on it. But what makes this go through the best for me is that my emotions are more entwined with what is going on. I feel emotionally invested in the well-being of my own characters.

I actually think I’m doing it right. The scariest part right now: pitching to an agent at LDS Storymakers, which is 4 months to the day. Yeah, I’ll be nervous with butterflies in my stomach.

So, who out there is qualified (I dare not use ‘very qualified’ thanks to this blog post from yesterday) that wants to edit my book for me. Actually, I really would only want the first fifty pages. Hmm….no money right now sucks. That’s because I’m sure aliens abducted all my money. Speaking of…

Alien abductions are involuntary, but probings are scheduled.

The 2010 Bronz Awards

My high school always gives/gave (if they don’t now) out paper plate awards during the Senior Assembly. They did what they could to come up with random awards, write them down on a paper plate, and announce them in the school before throwing it in the crowd. (I bet the majority of you, whom I’ve met since I graduated from high school, would never guess what award I got. But I’d be curious to see guesses in the comments.)

So, my oldest brother ended up with the nickname Bronz in high school. Our middle brother had the name for a little bit. I was dubbed Little Bronz occasionally by some of his friends. But that didn’t last. But you know, when I decided I was going to give out awards, I figured I’d use this awesome term. (FYI, there is not a letter missing in Bronz. That’s its spelling.) And without further ado (I love that word, it’s so old fashioned), here are the 2010 Bronz Awards. (Please note: I am the sole member of the nominating committee and voting committee. Maybe one day, when I’m big and famous, I’ll make categories where other people can nominate awards and/or vote.)

1. Best Book I Read: Mistborn by Brandon Sanderson. Honestly, if I could write as smooth as this book felt, I’d be published. Honorable Mention: I Am Not a Serial Killer by Dan Wells

2. My Favorite Book Cover: Mr. Monster by Dan Wells. 2nd Place: Cold as Ice by Stephanie Black. I don’t care what LDS Publisher says. But go to the site and vote on covers if you’d like.

3. Favorite Blog Post on Timothy Types TMI: Survivor: LDS Storymakers. Even though there are others I liked more, receiving about 500 hits to that post made me feel like someone important. My 15 minutes of LDS author fame are up now, but it was fun.

4. Best Proper Use of the Word “Its”: Annette Lyon (She is the Queen Word Nerd and Grammar Nazi for a reason. Also, this should just be named the Annette Lyon award.)

5. Funniest Presenter at a Writers Conference: Sarah Eden. Why? Because no one can read Bubba and Dan like she can. I’ll go ahead and shout-out 2nd place to Robison Wells’ writer’s block presentation at UVU’s book academy.

6. Best Use of the Last Minute For a Presenter at a Writers Conference: Howard Tayler at LDStorymakers: Worldbuilding. Shoot, he wasn’t even supposed to teach. Runner-up: Robison Wells at the UVU’s Book Academy, again. I saw him finishing his presentation at the last minute. And it was a good presentation because it involved interaction.

7. Best Writing Conference Swag Bag Item: The Water Bottle from UVU Book Academy. Seriously, those things are so awesome. Get a refill whenever you want one at no charge on a fountain drink. Rob Wells agreed with me.

8. Best Introduction at a Writing Shindig: Me! Introducing Elana Johnson at the LUW-Writers Workshop in May. She’s a reality tv fan like me. ’nuff said.

9. Most Creative Blog Post: 30 Uses For a Hanger. My friend Casey’s blog post over at Camiba’s Corner. Guess what, it’s fairly awesome. And guess what, I helped write it.

10. Best Music Mashup: Bad Day Gives You Hell Seriously, is it not true? Runner-up: Tubthumping Tubthumping. Cause that’s just cool that the same song played on two different stations.